[VENT] Argh! Family issues!

[Miss.September]

$100 a week is cheap, especially when it includes food! Maybe get some notices from your local paper for shared rentals and show her just how much of a favour you're doing her if she continues on with the silent treatment. Hope you're okay and not stressed

[Yas]

Thankyou so much everybody for reading and replying. You all really helped me when i needed it (well, it still helps me lol) Im really grateful.
I'll see how everything goes-my 20yr old sister is supposed to be moving out on saturday but i doubt it will happen. I hope so.
And 18 yr old has agreed to pay $100 a week-she's not happy about it and keeps asking me if i'm going to reduce it

Thanks again for all your support xxxxxx

[NaeNae]

Glad things are looking up for you.

I will say though even if they don't like it, they are not only using food, there is water, gas, electricity as well as the petrol for all the running around after them that you do. As for their mess I have one answer to that. If they don't clean up their act, just pick up their belongings and dirty dishes and pop them on their beds. with a note saying that the maid has resigned.

If they grumble about that, then tell them if they cannot clean up their own mess then you don't have the time to be running around driving them everywhere.

they are clearly taking full advantage of you and KNOW that your a soft touch.

Hopefully the eldest will be movin gout for you but I'd also let her go with a warning - if she doesn't move this weekend she'll be contributing $100 for her board and that she too will be expected to clean up after herself. Gosh being an AHM to one is hard enough to keep up with things bugger looking after your two adult sisters like they were your kids too.

Good luck hun

Nae x x

[Yas]

NaeNae- Thankyou I do throw all thier belongings into the room- but it's just so annoying that i have to cart thier crap up the stairs in the first place. Im 27 weeks pregnant ffs! They are adults, but act like children when they are around me. It drives me mad.
Thankyou xxxxxxxxxx

[NaeNae]

I didn't realise your place was double story ........ bugger that - put their crap on the door step!

[Catastrophic]

Hugs Yas. I hope that the eldest moves out and you are able to have a little breather. And maybe the youngest will fall into line a little more.

Your nice, I told my little bro if he wants to move it it's $150 a week and no arguements. I hope they know how easy they have it.

[fionas]

It sounds like the situation is resolving slowly. It also sounds like you and all your siblings have had a really rough trot and regardless of the fact that you are all officially now adults, I can imagine that to young adults like your sisters they may need reassurance that they are loved and they have someone to turn to unconditionally. Usually that's our parents but unfortunately in your family it's you and that's not really fair when you're pregnant. That also doesn't excuse them being pigs and taking you for granted at all but I wonder if some gentle words may work too like, "I love you, I want to be here for you but when you treat me like this, I don't feel loved either."

I'd recommend that you either have a big heart-to-heart on neutral ground like a cafe or have a few family counselling sessions where you can all talk it out. I think also emphasise to them that you are trying to teach them the skills that they will need to have in the big, wide world - like budgeting. We all have to learn those skills to survive and you're not being harsh at all.

[Yas]

I didn't realise your place was double story ........ bugger that - put their crap on the door step!

Lol, I have thought about it!

MN- thanks hun. I think my littlest sis will fall into line-she helps sometimes. TBH i would expect alot more money from anyone else who was boarding with us, but i know that this is the only oppertunity my sister will have to save up money to get the things she needs- like a car, bond, furniture etc. She has no-one else to help her xx

It sounds like the situation is resolving slowly. It also sounds like you and all your siblings have had a really rough trot and regardless of the fact that you are all officially now adults, I can imagine that to young adults like your sisters they may need reassurance that they are loved and they have someone to turn to unconditionally. Usually that's our parents but unfortunately in your family it's you and that's not really fair when you're pregnant. That also doesn't excuse them being pigs and taking you for granted at all but I wonder if some gentle words may work too like, "I love you, I want to be here for you but when you treat me like this, I don't feel loved either."

I'd recommend that you either have a big heart-to-heart on neutral ground like a cafe or have a few family counselling sessions where you can all talk it out. I think also emphasise to them that you are trying to teach them the skills that they will need to have in the big, wide world - like budgeting. We all have to learn those skills to survive and you're not being harsh at all.

Thankyou Yeah, my parents are useless, they never should have been able to have kids.....i guess that's what so hard about this situation-they really don't have anyone else.....just me. We have no close aunties or anyone. It was always us together, the awesome foursome It tears me apart because i love them so much, have protected them the best that i could, given everything for so long......but it's changed, because i am a mummy and soon to be wife now.
I have my own family that need me, that i need to be able to protect and nurture. Not that i won't be there for my sisters and brother...
We have been talking alot over the last day, and hopefully we'll have more of a chat tonight to sort out exactly what's going on.
Thankyou for your advice xx